I once heard a preacher say that “if you are the smartest person in a group, then you need to find a new group.” I initially questioned this statement because I thought being the smartest in the group was a good thing and that it showed you are intelligent. After all, others in the group are prone to admire you, look to you for answers or perhaps even aspire to be like you, right? But then I realized that being the smartest means you’ve set the bar for the group. If that is the case, then who is setting the bar for you?
I also realized that being the smartest in the group can result in others being jealous of you or feeling intimidated by you. Instead of celebrating your accomplishments, they find ways to discredit them and make you feel ashamed or guilty for achieving something they didn’t. For this reason, some women hide their true selves just to fit in or be accepted by the group. This must never be! Women deserve to be proud of their accomplishments while also preserving their honor and integrity. Therefore, if no one else appreciates you, then appreciate yourself! Appreciate the women who blazed paths to become the first female professor, attorney, judge, astronaut, CEO, Vice-President of the United States, etc.
My oldest daughter is writing her doctoral dissertation on curriculum and instruction for bilingual/ESL education. Most individuals are impressed by this. However, my daughter’s ex-boyfriend told her that because she is earning a Ph.D., no man will want to be with her (I am sooooo glad he is her “ex”). Thank goodness my daughter did not let his words impact her in a negative way. Instead, his words inspired her to work harder on completing her dissertation before her target completion date. She decided not to suppress her goals just because someone else felt intimidated…and if that means no boyfriend, then so be it! Good for her!
Ladies, don’t let other’s negative opinion about you define who you are. If you do, then you risk holding yourself back from being your best. Be inspired by Eleanor Roosevelt’s quote which says, “no one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” Stay true to who you are. This means being honorable. It means being authentic. It does ‘not’ mean pretending to be something that you’re not. It absolutely means being something that you are! Make a commitment right now to maximize your strengths and minimize your weaknesses. Lastly, every time you look in a mirror, admire all of your splendor and give yourself permission to be…you!